Marti and Nino
Dear
Birth Parent,
Thank you so much
for taking the time to read about us! As we write this letter, we take into
consideration the process you are going through at this time in your life.
As a mom, I can only imagine how difficult this must be for you. However, we
admire you for considering adoption and are so encouraged by your desire to
make this life choice for your child. We know that this is one of the most
challenging decisions you will ever have to make! With this in mind, we know
that you are looking for the family (or couple) that would best love and
nurture your child. With that in mind, we want to thank you again for
reading through these pages and express our gratitude that you would
consider us. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Please allow me
(Marti) to introduce our family to you. We are Nino, Marti and Nino Jr. We
are a family of three (not including the Beaver – who you will see in our
photos). As you read through these pages, my hope is that you would have a
good sense of who we are and where we have come from. Our goal is to give
you peace of mind. We want to give you as much information as possible.
However, there is so much to share. As we recount our history, we will try
to be brief but detailed at the same time. We want you to have a clear
picture of our lives, how we came together and how we've grown as well.
Here’s a little
family history:
(Big) Nino is
from Illinois. He was raised in a suburb called Broadview. Nino’s dad is an
Italian/American and his mom is a Greek/American. Nino has three siblings;
brother/Joe; sisters/ Kelly and Nina. We have 3 nieces and 3 nephews
(Maria, Mia, Ray, Michael, Luke and Anna). Nino’s mom, Maria, and dad,
Kelly, were married for approximately 20 years and divorced when Nino was in
High School. Since then, his dad has remarried and his mom is engaged.
Maria currently lives in Illinois. Kelly lives in Orlando, Fl but is moving
back to Chicago this year. Most of Nino’s cousins, uncles and aunts live in
Illinois. It’s really nice that they are relatively close up there. It
helps when we go up for our visits. We try to make it once a year.
Marti was born
and raised in N.Y. Marti’s dad, Ricky, was Peruvian and her mom, Harriet,
is a European/American. It’s kind of like the United Nations between us
all! Mom and dad were married for approximately 12 years, and then divorced
when Marti was 9 years old. Since then, mom has remarried and dad has
deceased. Marti has one sister (Nancy) who lives in NY with our nephew
(Zach) and niece (Lexis). Marti and her mom moved to Puerto Rico in the
late 70’s and returned to the States in the early 90’s. Marti’s mom, better
known as Nana, will be moving up to Georgia as soon as she sells her place
in Orlando, FL. When Marti was a child, mom and dad spoke to Marti in
Spanish only. My nanny, Aixa, only spoke to me in Spanish. So that helped a
ton! Marti is now bilingual. By the way, Aixa is still in my life. I call
her my 2nd Mom. Her daughter Naara is (as far as I am concerned)
my little sister. You will see pictures of her and her hubby in our album.
Our history
together:
Here's how Nino
and Marti met. In January 1997, a mutual friend introduced us. Wow, ten
years, I can’t believe it! It’s funny how we both moved to Florida in 1991,
not knowing each other and obviously unaware that we would meet 6 years
later (just a side note). We will be married 9 years this June. We have a
5-year-old son who just started Kindergarten. His name is (little) Nino as
well. We adopted him at birth. What an incredible experience! It was and
is incredible to this day!!! I will share more about that with you later.
Anyway, let me
share our first date with you. Keep in mind this is Marti narrating this
memory. Nino asked me to go the Opera. We saw Don Giovanni. Neither one of
us had ever been to an Opera. When it was over, Nino surprised me with a
delightful dinner at the finest Burger King in town. Now that is romance!
I have to admit, I do love their onion rings. It was our first date, of
course I didn’t eat!
In January of
1998, we went engagement ring shopping. After a diligent search, we found
“the” ring at Zales jewelry store. Nino asked me to be his wife at the
jewelry counter in front of the sales lady as I chose “the” ring. The sales
lady almost had to slap me out of my trance so that I could respond to the
question. After 5 long seconds, I said “YES”. Someone should have been
filming this. It would have made a great commercial!
We had a 5-month
long engagement and were married in June 1998. We were blessed with an
amazing wedding! People from all over the country came (even from
Ecuador). We had approximately 250 friends and family there. It was
wonderful!
One of the
biggest milestones in our marriage was when we found God. In our walk with
God as a couple, we had attended church but never felt a deep connection
with God. In February 1999, after studying the Bible with friends, we
became Christians. Our lives were never the same! We have been attending the
same church ever since and are so grateful for how God has changed us in our
marriage and in all areas of our lives. He has also blessed us with great
friends in our church family. Without God and without our friends and
family, I don’t know how we would have made it through what was yet to
come.
In January of
1999, I (Marti) went through a series of tests and soon discovered that I
had obstructions in my fallopian tubes and therefore was unable to
conceive. After a minor surgery, the doctor said I had a 50/50 chance.
With that 50/50 shot we decided to try. Three months later we were so
excited to found out I was pregnant. Because of my previous issues my
doctor monitored me very closely. After about one week, we realized that
there was a problem with our pregnancy. From that point on, I was at the
doctor’s office every other day for a couple of weeks. They finally
determined that I had an ectopic pregnancy. My doctor told me I needed
surgery to take the baby out because it was lodged in one of my tubes and
the baby would never make it and I could die if it ruptured. With no other
choice, we went ahead with the surgery, only to find out that I was still
pregnant. He thought the embryo was in the tube that he had repaired when
in fact it had burrowed into the damaged tube. Because I had already been
through two surgeries between January and April, he decided to give me a
medication that they would normally give to cancer patients to try to stop
the growth of the embryo.
After 10 days of
more blood tests, I was still pregnant and the baby was still growing. At
this point he decided to perform surgery again and put an end to this agony.
Needless to say, words cannot possibly express the despair we lived through.
Our hopes and dreams of having a baby were ripped away. With all that had
happened, my doctor suggested we consider In-Vitro Fertilization. We
thought and prayed about it. After a couple of months we decided to move
forward with the hope of getting pregnant this way knowing it was the only
chance we had.
We were really
unprepared for the rollercoaster ride we were in for. We lived on a time
schedule that revolved around the medication. Nino had to administer these
meds to me. I don’t know if people really know how grueling it is to go
through IVF. Your life is taken over and completely revolves around this
process! Not to mention your hormones going absolutely wild. Also, the
nervousness about the outcome is enough to give a person a nervous
breakdown. I am not exaggerating. One of the worst things to top it off is
the needles. I have never been a fan of getting injections at the doctor’s
office let alone getting one from my husband (poor guy). Needless to say,
to surrender to the fact that I would have to be injected with different
hormones (depending on which part of the cycle I was in) every day, for
approximately 21 days or more, was something I really had to get over
quickly.
When our first
and second attempt failed, we decided to proceed with our 3rd
attempt at this craziness. In the middle of our In-Vitro, a friend of ours
heard of a mom who was in her 3rd trimester of pregnancy and in a
very difficult situation. She had been searching for adoptive parents for
her child that was to be born very soon. My friend advised us to hire a
lawyer immediately, and we did. In the meantime, it was time for
fertilization and implantation of our embryos. Once they were implanted in
my uterus I had to be on bed rest for 5 days, and at the end of this period,
I would go in for a pregnancy test.
Once again, our
hopes had been dashed! In the same week, I found out I wasn’t pregnant and
we also found out that the mom changed her mind. She found out the gender of
her child and decided she was going to keep her baby. She had had boys in
the past and had given them all up for adoption, but she found out she was
having a girl and it changed everything for her. It’s hard to explain what
it felt like, being in my shoes, let alone the fact that my hormones were
out of control. We were truly happy for her, but honestly, our hearts were
broken and grieving the loss of everything all at once.
Through it all,
we have to say that our God is faithful and knows what is best for all of
us. Our faith took us places we had never been before! But we held on to
the Lord for dear life and He held on to us and kept us going. Within the
same week, another situation arose at our lawyer’s office. This new
possibility had risks attached, however, through prayer and petition and
much advice, God answered our prayers. We accepted and moved forward.
We are here to
say that this is how God brought us our little son, Nino. We are so
blessed! I (Marti) was able to assist in Nino’s birth. I watched him come
into this world and take his first breath. Nino (my husband) stood behind a
curtain in the labor room and heard everything. He told me that he was so
nervous that he almost passed out! What an amazing experience! We
were so blessed that his mother, who gave him life, let us experience birth
through her. Something I had dreamed of and could not do on my own. She
was so giving and loving. I hold a very special place in my heart for her
eternally. She gave us an opportunity of a lifetime, and she did what
was within her reach to give her son a chance at a better life. Having him
as my own now, I see what an amazing woman she is and how incredibly
selfless she was with her decision. She changed all of our lives forever.
Respectfully and
very happily, we have kept in touch over the years and she expresses how
very grateful she is to this day, as are we! We love her with all of our
hearts and the memories we experienced together keep us bonded for a
lifetime!
Since Nino’s
birth, the love my son has received through so many people has been
amazing! We were given three baby showers in a 2-month time span. So many
people had suffered the previous losses right along with us, so when we were
finally given the opportunity to become parents, our friends and family
really went over the top. We had family fly in to see him. It was truly
amazing! It has been five years since that time, and I am still in awe over
all of the events that transpired around Nino coming into our family.
We moved to
Georgia one year ago, and we began to attend a church that was affiliated
with our Orlando church. We are now members and are very fortunate to have
a great church family here. God has given us wonderful friends that we can
mutually go to for spiritual advice and guidance. There’s an African saying,
“it takes a village to raise a child.” My husband and I agree on this
wholeheartedly! We settled into our house in October 2006 and have already
gotten connected with some of our neighbors. Many of the children go to the
same school together. Our community is very family-oriented! There’s a
great community playground, a few pools and several other amenities. We are
very happy to have chosen this place to live, especially for our son’s
sake.
Nino Sr. works as
a Staff Accountant. His loyalty and hard work are paying off, as he will
soon be recognized as a Senior Staff Accountant. His work schedule is
great. He goes into work early and comes home early enough to spend time
with our son before bedtime. I, (Marti), am very proud of how dedicated he
is. It was not easy to accomplish as much as he has with his education,
with a wife, a child and a full time job!
I (Marti) have
been extremely blessed having been able to stay at home with little Nino
since birth. Now that he is in school, I work one day a week just to add a
little extra cash to our pockets. However, if and when we are given the gift
of a brother or sister for Nino, I will be home fulltime once again.
Once again, we
really want to thank you for giving us the opportunity to share our lives
with you. As we re-told our history, some of it has made it very difficult
to re-visit. The memories of the heartache we went through with our trials
in our attempts to conceive were the most challenging. However, our focus
is the end result and we know God’s hand was at work the whole time! We
wouldn’t change a thing if it risked changing the outcome of us having Nino
in our lives. There is no doubt that it’s been a rollercoaster ride for
our marriage to endure, but we are stronger today than we were nine (9)
years ago. We know God has a plan for us all and we are thankful that it
turned out the way it did for us. Our son is such a joy!
We wish you the
very best in your journey through this time and in the future. We know that
your heart will speak to you and help you make this decision. God bless you
always!
Love,
Marti and Nino
“For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper
you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future”. Jeremiah
29:11
|
